saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
