And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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