the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
