South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
