I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
