i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I want a musical about memes.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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