you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
His nipple licking is glorious
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