Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
