so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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