so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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