Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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