If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
