he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I think I am morally bankrupt
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
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