last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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