just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
