Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
we're so committed to being not committed
Randomize
