Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I FOUND THE LEGS
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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