so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
