Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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