I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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