Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
