it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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