ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
You are the jesus of drinking
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
