Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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