new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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