You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Come see our sink grown plant.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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