I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
She even gives head with a lisp.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
