Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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