You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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