i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
