new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
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