You work out of a Hotel?
I don't think brook has ever known best
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
