I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
