I will die if light touches me.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
