Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
