I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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