I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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