guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
