Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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