One girl and one boy is just not enough.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
