vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
