my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Randomize
