You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize