Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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