I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
