Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
