do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize