So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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