Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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