Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
